Monthly Archives: June 2015

Our Angel Baby

I know this may not the right forum to discuss about the loss of our baby son, Rory, however I love talking and writing about our precious angel.  Rory was sadly born asleep on 30th May 2015 at 36 weeks and 4 days.  We found out the devastating news 2 days prior, that our son had slipped away. Since that day our world has been completely flipped upside down and our hearts have been shattered.

 

When Rory was delivered we couldn’t wait to hold him, he was perfect, he weighed 6lb 3oz and looked so peaceful.  We were lucky to spend time with him and create some memories.  I still got cut his cord and helped the midwife dress him.  Our midwife Rebecca was lovely, she prepared a memorial box for us, which contained a few photos, Rory’s hand and footprints and a lock of Rory’s hair.

 

The memorial boxes are provided by the charity SANDs. Sands is the stillbirth and neonatal death charity.  They operate throughout the UK, supporting anyone affected by the death of a baby, working to improve the care bereaved parents receive, and promoting research to reduce the loss of babies’ lives.

 

We were able to keep Rory with us all night in a cold cot, all the time he was with us we never felt sad and we was a family.  The hardest thing I’ve ever had to do in my life was to say goodbye to him and leaving our Son in the hospital.  We should have been walking out the hospital with him in our arms, instead of carrying a small box of memories.

 

I don’t think anything can be harder that day, harder than any race I’ve ever completed. The pains we endure during a half or full marathon soon disappear afterwards, this never will.

 

Rory may not be in our arms, but he will always be in our hearts and his spirit will always live on.  I’m thinking about some challenges I would like to complete in Rory’s memory, raise much needed money for SANDs and awareness of baby loss. Every time I now go running I always think of Rory and will always do my best to make him proud of his Daddy.

Running in Rory's memory.

Running in Rory’s memory.

Having Rory in my life has made me realise what things are important and to not worry about silly little things. One example is whilst out running I used to get so focused on time/pace and if I miss out on my target I would get so disappointed, therefore taking the enjoyment out of running. I know we all do it, so when your run hasn’t quite gone to plan don’t be too hard on yourself. Remember the reason why you started running and what you love about it.

 

my wife and I wanted to thank everyone for their overwhelming support we received from the running community when we broke the sad news.  We also wanted say a big thank you to everyone who kindly donated money to SANDs in Rory’s memory. Here is the link to Rory’s page, that was created, if anyone wishes to donate. https://www.justgiving.com/Babyrorysowden.